the slowest growing religion in the world: dudeism

How can you become a Brother Shamus?

1. Heed first the Dude’s call to “get out of that fucking car, man.”
2. Confess that you are indeed a dick.
3. Intend to do no harm.
4. Follow the Dude’s admonition to fuck off, but without begrudging the Dude.

Once you have taken these teachings to heart, you may consider yourself a Brother Shamus. Fabulous stuff, man.